My birthday hat from Liv...errr Bucket.
I read another friend's post on Facebook about the Birthday Project a couple months ago and thought "wow...that is really cool." If you haven't heard of it, it is people doing acts of kindness on to celebrate their birthday. Giving feels so much better than receiving, right?
If you are a new reader...I am the new kid on the block, and it has been very hard for me to adjust to life in Louisiana. We have been here since February...but I still haven't quite gotten into the swing of things yet...and not for lack of trying. I've contacted several play groups, other military spouses, and tried to just get out with my daughter...but I have not made one friend here. The mommy groups (after several attempts to call and email) never responded. Some of the military spouses have been super rude (although one lady at Chuck E Cheese was very very nice). And I feel like I get the stink eye when I'm out. I'm not sure if it is the California license plate, lack of a southern drawl, military town mentality, or that people are super religious and I have a child and no wedding ring...whatever it is, I have felt so alienated, depressed, and homesick. I have cried more days than not. So many times I just think...I wish someone would give me a hug. I haven't had a hug from someone that wasn't my daughter or boyfriend since I dropped my mom off at the airport in February. I've become very with drawn...I just don't want to get the looks or have my car hit and run again, so I stay inside. But I want to break free from that! I want to love Shreveport/Bossier! I want friends here!
So...with birthday 33 looming, all I could think was "wow...this is going to suck. Nick works late, so no dinner out. I don't have any friends. Money is super tight because I quit my job when we moved here and became a full time stay at home mom. Wow...I'm just going to sit home and cry all day." Back home I had a tradition...there is a very nice day spa, Glen Ivy Hot Springs, and they give you free admission for your birthday. I went every year the last 3 years. It was blissful, getting served drinks by the pool, soaking in the springs, cooling off in one of the salt water pools, and baking in the mud. Throw in a yummy lunch and it was heaven. I convinced my sisters to go the first year. And the last two my aunts and my mom went. I was pregnant one year, and felt my daughter kick for the first time there. I also would have a big party with my friends, dinner with my parents...it was a long week of celebrating. And I LOVED it.
After my initial reaction of thinking my birthday was going to suck...the light bulb went off. I remembered the Birthday Project. I remembered my friend who did this for her birthday and suddenly, I was happy. I made the decision that I would do 33 acts of kindness for my birthday. Maybe along the way I would meet some people and turn my frown upside down...learn things about the town and the people that make me feel good, instead of focusing on the news reports of crime, violence, and the fact that it is not Southern California.
I had to get started right away...because somethings take some planning. So I recruited help. I asked my friends for ideas and I posted the question to "Macaroni Kid Shreveport," in the hopes I would find out about local places or people who needed help. I did some internet research...and I came up with a list. Then I realized that doing 33 things in one day was a lot especially with a toddler who needs to eat, nap, and have her mommy time, so I did start a day early.
Sorry the photos are sideways...it keeps changing them when I load them!
#1 - Sent birthday cards. Nick's niece is turning 1 the day after my birthday. His family and I aren't the best of friends, but I made sure to send her a card wishing her a happy 1st birthday. And another very good friend has her birthday the day after mine as well, so I sent a card to her as well. I am NOT good about getting cards in the mail...so this was a huge step for me.
#2 - Donated a $25 AMC gift card to Ronald McDonald House Dallas. I week ago someone mentioned that they were in need of donations. I went on their web site and saw that they were asking for AMC gift cards...and we had one that we haven't been able to use because there are no AMC theaters in the area. Technically it was a Christmas gift to Nick from my mom...but it was just sitting here collecting dust, so now a family can hopefully go see a movie together.
#3 - Mailed a big stack of coupons to a military family in Japan. A month ago I signed up to adopt a family to send coupons to. I finally heard back from them and was matched with a family in Japan. The husband and wife are both active duty with 5 kids and a big dog. I sent them a bunch of coupons and the ones they don't use will be available at the commissary for other families.
#4 - Sent t-shirts to a little girl. One of my co-workers from years back lives in Arlington and has a one year old daughter named Cassidy or Cass for short, which happens to be my last name. My parents own a NASCAR team called Team Cass Racing. My friend asked me to send some swag for her room....so I sent an autographed baby tee and two adult tees for them with the Team Cass Racing logo.
#5 - Gave thanks to the postal workers. Since I had to make a post office run, I thought it would be nice to thank the postal workers. They have been very helpful, friendly, and have given excellent service. So not only did I thank the lady who helped me, but I also gave a thank you card for all the employees.
#6 - Coupon fairy! Last week I was in the commissary and someone left a big stack of coupons on a shelf and one of them was for peanut butter. I needed peanut butter...and did not have a coupon for it. This coupon fairy saved me 55 cents and I was thrilled. So I printed coupons and left them on the items they were for. I even gave some to people who were picking up those items I had coupons for. Note...I did not take pics of all the coupons I left. :)
#7 - Returned shopping carts to the cart catcher. No good deed goes unpunished they say...I totally hurt my foot doing this...but at least the parking lot was clear!
#8 - Made brownies for Nick and his co-workers. Again...I burned my hand...but the guys on the flight line will have brownies on my birthday! I also told them I was thankful they maintained the planes so they don't fall out of the sky.
#9 - Left feminine products in the ladies room. I think every woman has had that "oh crap" moment when they are out in public and Aunt Flo shows up for her monthly visit...and then realizes she has no products. Man I hate that! If you're lucky, there is a machine that is stocked and you have a quarter. If you're not...you sit there asking every woman who walks in and hope someone can help. I taped a bag of tampons and pads to the vending machine so that if this happens to a woman at Target, she won't have to panic.UPDATE: One of Nick's friends, who doesn't know me or know that I did this, saw the bag and posted a picture of it on her Facebook.
From Facebook
#10 - Annnnnnnd....being a mom...I always have to be prepared for accidents. The diaper bag is stocked with wipes, diapers, and an extra outfit... except that one time I ran out of wipes...and she had #2, and there were only hand dryer no paper towels. OH NO! Lucky for me, a nice woman in the bathroom had wipes in her purse and gave them to me. So to pay it forward, I left diapers, wipes, and a couple of onsies that no longer fit Liv in the bathroom at Target as well.
#11 - Coupon fairy #2. While at Target, I left coupons I printed for baby items with the items. They were good ones too! $10 and $20 off baby gear; the Eddie Bauer high chair, play yard, and travel system.
#12-22 - Visited LSU's Children's Hospital. Liv and I made a donation to the Children's hospital of some things we thought they could use. Coloring books, crayons, a Snow White Blue Ray (and DVD), a few baby clothes, some baby hats that I made, snacks, magazines for the waiting room, some books, and a baby travel kit that included shampoo, powder, desitin...and we left a bag with a few dollars of change on a vending machine, and left a bag with 8 packs of gum. TIP...if you want to do this, check the Target $1 bins. They have tons of books for kids.
#23 - Made a donation to Goodwill. We dropped off 5 bags of clothes and shoes for the Goodwill.
#24 - Had lots of playtime with my daughter. This one was important. Yes we play everyday, but I made sure to play whatever games she wanted today...from playing with her bus, to filling our entry way with balls, to having a tea party. We had a lot of fun together today!
#25 - Fed the ducks at the park. I wanted to share with other kids at the park, but there were NO kids! The plan was to let other kids help us feed the ducks and to share fruit snacks (her favorite) with other kids. We must have just gone at the wrong time. But we fed the ducks and fish...Liv played...and I got bit on the toe by a bug.
#26 - Left inspirational quotes. I wrote quotes on Post-Its and then left them in different locations that we visited today. I did not snap pics of them all...but the hope was that someone would be inspired. :)
#29 - Enjoyed the scenery. I really haven't done too much exploring...so on a whim I pulled off the road and parked at the river. We walked down to the edge and just sat there for a bit appreciating nature. LA has many more trees, grass, and bluer skies than So Cal. It was more of a kindness to ourselves...but still, I needed that.
#30 - Left a tip. On the way home we were hot and thirsty! So we headed to Smoothie King and we left the girls a nice tip.
#31 - Gave myself a pedicure. I know...this wasn't for someone else...but my philosophy is that to feel good about yourself is a great gift and in feeling good about yourself, you will want to make others feel good too. I'm not explaining this very well...but hopefully it makes sense.
#32 - And some other small things we did...Let pedestrians cross the street even without a cross walk. Opened doors, gave smiles, said thank you to everyone, and drove courteously.
#33 - I also have a donation ready to go to the puppy shelter. We tried to go Saturday, but I could not find the place... :/ But it will get done! I have a bunch of blankets and a dog bed to donate. We (Nick and I) also want to volunteer to help with adoption events. And hopefully talk some Airmen into it too :)
Thank you to all the people who inspired me to do this and gave me ideas. You all had a part in this!!!Be kind to your fellow humans everyday. Everyday we have opportunities to be kind. Just pay it forward and together we WILL make this world better. :)
